Yeah, so, it’s like, a billion below freezing here in Kansas City, and there’s this winter dandruff that’s too wimpy to call itself snow, and is more akin to the tears of frozen elves dripping onto everything making the world outside into one big pole onto which you will freeze your tongue, et al, if you dare step outside.
I might be exaggerating. A little. But not about the elf tears.
To make us feel better about this disgusting mess we call “Winter,” here are a couple of sites listing some pretty awesome cold weather horror movies. And some pretty awful ones, too (Jack Frost? Not snow, more like a steaming pile, ihho, d’accord.)
My fave takeaways:
— Dead Snow. Actually, Dead Snow 2 for me, because one of the best uses of an intestine EVAR.
— The Thing. Yup, 1982’s version. Jack Burton drives to the north pole, eats Snake Plissken’s id, and hunts sloppy seconds.
— 30 Days of Night. This is one of my FAVORITE Vampire movies. It’s got love, it’s got gore, it’s got big-ass machinery to help kill some seriously Olympic-quality bloodsuckers. Oh- and it’s set in Barrow, Alaska, where the sun goes down for 30 days. You know, like a Kardashian. (BOOM!)
Anyway, stay warm, stay safe, get some eyball shivers.